Tuesday, July 18, 2006


I have really itchy feet today… not physically, but I just have an urge to go out, do something, dance, go crazy, do anything other than sit in the office and stare at the screen. I considered leaving work and going to the gym and coming back after lunch, but the problem is that my gym is next door to my apartment, so by the time I drove home and got into my gym clothes it would be time to make the drive back to Herzlia and work. I dream of a day when I have a gym in my office so that whenever I get the urge I can go to the gym, or even better I could just work from home and when the urge takes me to go to the gym, or sleep, or open a bottle of wine, or watch TV, or go for a walk (you get the point) I could just do it!

Just do it! It’s a great advert, the problem is that in the real world where people have to work nine to six (whatever happened to nine to five?) it is a little difficult to just get up and run when the mood takes you… not that the mood ever takes me in that direction, but you get where I am coming from. I am on edge, I need release, I need to punch something, I need to dance my ass off as opposed to sitting on my ass for nine hours doing something totally unfulfilling. But even when I turn my hand to something more fulfilling, like writing my blog, writing my book or reading my favourite blogs, I am still totally unsatisfied, because I don’t want to be sitting at all! Sorry I am not complaining… I am just stating a fact so you can understand my state of body… my mind isn’t really connected at the moment.

The problem is that I think that the painkillers, antibiotics, and all the vitamins I am on at the moment, have created a chemical reaction in my body which is literally making it move of its own accord. It is worse in the mornings. I am jumping out of bed, even though my eyes are still closed, I am grooving in the office when no-one else is even listening to the music. Yes I do look pretty funny shaking my ass while still sat on my chair, and yes people in the office think that I am loco, but to be fair they have thought that for a long time. My work colleagues do find me entertaining, “Channah’s gone ADD again!” The girls in the IL department stick their heads over our wall to watch the Channah Comedy Show, which gives me a nice break and a good giggle. This is when I would like to be going to the gym! But no sooner after I come back from lunch, the chemical imbalance shifts again and I find myself sluggish and tired… no energy to lift my finger to type, nevermind do a full workout. My eyes are closing, and my brain has turned to mush, and all I want to do is find a little corner somewhere where I can sleep in peace… I just don’t want to have to go too far to get there… under my desk maybe? “No no… the entertainment club is shut… no I don’t want to laugh about how your boss stares at my boobs! He can stare all he likes for all I care… Yes I know he was an ass man before I joined the office… Please just let me sleep!”

I go home. I potter around the apartment for a few, and then BAM! Suddenly I have all the energy and more that I had in the morning. It is a mystery how the chemicals swirl around my body and then rush to the surface in waves… how I wish I could channel that energy somehow to ensure that I reach my peak just as I put on my gym clothes, but obviously it does not work that way, and instead I find myself in the local shop staring longingly at the bottles of red wine that I cannot drink at the moment because of these damn antibiotics!! Oh well, only five more days to go… I swear I will return to sanity soon… I hope…. Help?

No comments: