Monday, May 21, 2007

Dear Anonymous

You may be wondering why I rejected your comment. You may think it is because I was offended by you branding me a “fat whiny cow”, something that I have never thought myself to be, but clearly you felt quite strongly that I am a fat whiny cow, so therefore that must be what I am, and as a result I am going to do everything in my power to embrace that fact and try to better myself… or perhaps just use it as an excuse for being a moody and rude bitch 24/7… “Sorry, no I cannot come out tonight I am a fat whiny cow!”

Anyway, the fact that I am a fat whiny cow is not the reason that I rejected your eloquently put comment. No, I rejected your comment because you are a sad and pathetic individual who hides who they are under the cloak of “Anonymous”. In truth you could be even more fat and whiny than I am, but sadly we cannot see that because you are “Anonymous”. It is funny because for the most part I associate Anonymous with being Irrelevant… I guess is it better to be something than nothing/ than irrelevant/ than anonymous… perhaps even fat and whiny.

So thank you for your comments Anonymous. You make me a better person everyday.

Channahboo (With a Perm-a-grin on her face)

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Virtual Disbelief

Can you believe that it is 6.30pm and I am still in work? I feel like the office has sucked me in and will not let me leave. I know that this is nothing compared to the hours I used to work in the UK, and I know that I only came into work at 10.30, but right now I am struggling.

Everyone has left my side of the office and there is an eerie silence all around me. The sound of computers humming on standby act as mufflers for the activity that I know is taking place on the other side of the office where the lawyers and trainees actually work long hours and are probably in the middle of discussing some big deposition.

I don’t think I can do this again. Stay late. Pretend to work. Feel the neon light strips above me get brighter as the light outside dims. I don’t think that this was a very good idea; coming into work late to see what it is like. It is bad. It is shit. It is wrong.

And even though I know that it means missing out on walking with him to my car in the morning and kissing him good-day, I have decided that I am giving it up for early ends to my working day. I did try!

He cannot understand as he spends his day constantly on the move, constantly meeting new and interesting people, constantly communicating in dulcet and sensual tones to shmooze every innocent passerby, as opposed to voicelessly and emotionlessly (well apart from the emoticons you spent a day and a half downloading) communicating in the virtual environment of email, MSN, Facebook/ Myspace and any other website you sign up to, to avoid doing the immortally boring work you are paid close to minimum wage to do.

But please understand. As someone who is always the first to run home from work, I now see how sad it is to be the last one at work, as you slowly watch your friends leave one by one. And you know that they are free of the burden of work, while you have to still sit there, even though you are doing nothing and have closed down your Outlook, pretending to work until you have come close to completing your compulsory 9 hours a day.

Ok that is it! I quit!!!! Sushi is calling me… fuck the computer!